The fact is that you actually dont need me to continue living..

you can do it without me..

wanna let you go

and I forget how it feels like anymore..

You do not have time for me..

Am I actually too much for wanting you attention and time a little bit more?

i feel neglected..

we are falling apart..why is it so?

I told you I was stress today so I had to cry..

I said I stress cuz i stayed at home too long, I sleep too much and bout the argument last night..

Part of it is true.. about the argument..You know how I feel?

Like you forget how would i feel with things you says.. it's heartbreaking..

When I talk to you, i try my best not to say things that would hurt you..

I know what Im saying here, you might not agree or feel offensive.. Im sorry bout it..

The new blog, one of the reason I'm doing it because I know that sometimes at night you are too tired or i might forget to tell you things that happen in my daily life..

Things that I'm excited about and things that dont always happen that I wanna tell you..

So that you can actually read it and know bout what happened..

Should I or should I not post this thing here..

i miss you, that is all i can say..

Tonight feel so lost without you...

Everyone is like doing their own thing..

Mummy daddy most probably spending time with the dogs and watching tv..

Sis with Den..

You having futsal tournament..

Me, I'm here thinking bout what you guys are doing and I got nothing on hand at all..

Everything I do doesn't feel right.. All i hope is time passes faster so I can get to work tomorrow morning and spend the rest of my day..

3 more days, to 20th of June...

and I still love you the same way that I do, and its getting deeper and deeper..

if only things are easier..

i know its gonna be hard..

you said this is the price we have to pay..

even thought i make mistake much more than you..

sometimes i just feel i want you more compared to you..

it hurts when i sent messages to you in the morning..

messages bout how much i misses you, how much i want to see you..

you did not reply , even though you call you mention nothing bout it..

I'm sorry I'm bad

I'm sorry you re blue

I'm sorry bout all the things I said to you and i know i cant take it back

I love how you kiss

I love how you sound

baby the way you make my world go round and i just wanted to say I'm sorry..

What happen if there's no trust anymore?

I miss you and things weren't the same..

never did fail to love you over and over again..

Dear Love..

Don't leave me..

I regret..

I promised..again..

~watching you is the only drug I need..~

"I never agree on long distance relationship.."

You make me do long-distance-love with U..

You fill up the colour of the rainbow I draw..

You fill up the answers that are left empty before your presence..

You make me believe in dreams, that we should go chase after it..

You make me feel no matter what happens, you got my back..

You make me feel brave..

You may think I'm a dreamer, but you make it all so real..

I now have someone to finish up my food that I can't finish..

I now have someone to share my fear with.. Fear of ghost, loneliness, loosing each other..

I now have U..

I love you

Sun..

is our love that thin?

longing for your comfort..

Big 2

From this cute lil' boy..

To be the guy that I wanna be with in my life..

Broken heart.. Then, we manage to live without each other..

And here, you are now.. Part of my life now..a young man, my boyfren, my life.. that I can't live without.. and never wanna be apart from you no more..

So much we've been through...

Happy 20th Birthday, love...

Old saying: Wish that this day will come every year..

i love you

sun..

It doesn't feel so great after all...
...insecure

Contented

6 months pass so fast...

i feel contented..

Yea, you make me feel my life is complete, compare to others who are struggling seeking for attention, feeling lonely when they know in the end of the day, no one is there for them..

Me, I know you gonna be at everywhere I be, not by your presence, but your heart, your courage and your support..

I know you got my back no matter what..

You make me live my life with dreams..

I still remember I said I always expect things to the worst, so that when I got nothing at least I wont feel dissapointed..

You told me you dislike this kind of person.. You change me and make me feel better when we at least got to live in dream..

When we have dream, we work upon it and try to achieve it.. Even if I dont achieve it, at least I know I've tried my best and I dont need to feel so bad..

Now I hold on to my dreams.. Being a nurse full of passion.. I love the things I doing..

I love my life, my family, my friends because I got you..

No matter what happen, I know you are willing to share with me.. You wont ditch me and run away during bad times..

And one thing, I live my life to the fullest, make sure i do everything i should so There's no chance of regretting for what I did not do..

This is for you baby.. Do what you should do now.. Don't turn back and feel regret for what you did not do best..

I love you and always do.. I'll always be here..

Fate seems to put us together all the times.. There's magnet between us that always pull us back together..

Always will be here...

..sun..

For it was not my look you love, but my heart..

It was not my body you love, but my touch..

It was not my arms you love, but my embrace..

Now that I love you, I have you..

I swear I'd never fall again..

I don't even feel like falling..

I'm never gonna shut you out..

Eternity it will be..

Love..

Love

Time passes real fast..

Its almost 6 months since September 09'..
I love you and never wanna let you go, love..

you.. yea you.. Blur Case

Im sorry..

This is the only way I find that I can express myself..

Love but stranger..

i need you here so much..

sometimes you can be so close to me, like another half of me..

sometimes you can be quite a stranger.. like you never touch my life..

i miss all those sweet time we had, even we're not meeting each other..

"how's class now, baby?"

"is everything alright?"

"did you get better in flag football now? and how's futsal?"

"how many touchdown you get to do?"

"are you thinking of me now?"

What's love when trust is absence..

Its like opening a door without a key..

I know i did wrong and wrong and wrong again and again..

I feel tired of myself already, when i can't defend myself at all cuz' I'm at fault..

i miss you a lot.. drowning..

Paranoid

I wanna see how Love set me free..

I feel far away...

Lost my handphone and all my money!!

You are not only stealing my phone, you STEAL every single private life of mine..

You invaded my life WITHOUT permission!!

Are you here with me, love?

Human found love, lost love and found love again..

Dilemma...

What an Image...

I miss U already..!!!

2010

I realize every post in my blog is all about You & Me..

Now I gonna start something new...

At least, as my diary.. For me to have a walk to remember..

Year 2010 had started, and I'm gonna be 20..

I'm not paranoid about it.. but I still feel a lil' blue..

No one wants to get old that fast right..

Poor heidy. gonna be 20 in 3 months time baby.. C:

College started.. Not so well... I will only have 6 weeks of theory classes, 1 revision week, 2 examination week, and the rest of the sem is my Practical week..

It's like start working already..

Exhausted..

This semester feels like I'm so senior that we have to guide the junior in practical area..

and they're doing things super slow..

Practical time, 7 hours of working doesn't feel so long, in fact sometimes we have ho work over time as our works not completed yet..

I miss class a lot.. meeting up with my friends cuz' we are all break in to different different ward..

New year Resolution... not my thingy..

but i have new year wish..

I wanna excel better than I am now in study..

I wanna save coins for my future use..

I wanna loose weight a lil'..

I wanna spend another Chinese New Year, Valentine's Day, Wesak Day, Thaipussam, Awal Muharam, Hari Raya, Christmas, and all the days in 2010.. last but not least another 2oth of September with you, love.. <3

Things getting real now.. C:

I love you..

--Sun--

Sunday Morning

Looks like me and you on Sunday morning..

You with your style of sleep when you got your almost-every-night-nose-block.. =)

I miss you alot.. Miss Sunday morning....

PLUS EQUALS TO PERFECT MATCH

can't wait till another Sunday morning..

i heart you baby boi..

17012010

Today's a winding road that's taken me to places that I didn't want to go
Today in the blink of an eye I'm holding on to something and I do not know why
I tried

I tried to read between the lines
(I tried to look in your eyes)
I want a simple explanation
(For what I'm feeling inside)
I gotta find a way out
Maybe there's a way out

Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
Do you know you're unlike any other?
You'll always be my thunder, and I said
Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors
I don't wanna ever love another
You'll always be my thunder
So bring on the rain
And bring on the thunder

Today's a winding road
Tell me where to start and tell me something I don't know
Whoa
(Whoa, whoa, whoa)
Today I'm on my own
I can't move a muscle and I can't pick up the phone
I don't know
(I don't know, I don't know, I don't know)

And now I'm itching for the tall grass
And longing for the breeze
I need to step outside
Just to see if I can breathe
I gotta find a way out
Maybe there's a way out

Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
Do you know you're unlike any other?
You'll always be my thunder, and I said
Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors
I don't wanna ever love another
You'll always be my thunder
So bring on the rain

Yeah I'm walking on a tightrope
I'm wrapped up in vines
I think we'll make it out
But you just gotta give me time
Strike me down with lightning
Let me feel you in my veins
I wanna let you know how much I feel your pain

Today's a winding road that's taken me to places that I didn't want to go
Whoa

Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
Do you know you're unlike any other?
You'll always be my thunder, and I said
Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors
I don't wanna ever love another
You'll always be my thunder, and I said

Your voice (this is getting colder)
Was the soundtrack of my summer (yeah the summer's over)
Do you know you're unlike any other?
You'll always be my thunder
So bring on the rain (well today's a winding road)
Oh baby bring (today I'm on my own)
On the pain
And listen to the thunder

Worthless..

Sorry for being imperfect..

I know I did alot of mistakes..

I think you know me too much, that you're sick of the same thing ever and ever again..

You make me feel so worthless with your words...

I feel so weak..

Feels like suffocating.. I cant take a breathe..

Feels like its the end of the worlds, which I must still go on..

I rather give up..

I know both side feel hurt, pain...

Tell me what to do..

if i am

i would leave u without hesitation

i can tell u tat now